there they are a-standing in a row

I'm going to type this post all in one paragraph, because it enrages me how Chrome and Blogger interact and double space the first paragraph and single space the following paragraphs.  I will delineate paragraph breaks with asterisks.  ********  Oof, the setup for this story is disproportionately complicated for the payback, but I accept the challenge:  Our speakers on Sunday were a departing missionary and a husband and wife who have had one son serve a mission and another son who likely will be serving a mission as well.  The missionary is one of those young people you meet who make you feel a little bit embarrassed about how well they've got life figured out, compared to where you were at that age.  He's an incredible young man: hardworking, responsible, polite . . . I could go on.  I just admire the heck out of him.  Anyway, the husband of the couple converted to the church some time after they were married, and he was comparing himself to the missionary, and said, "My goals at that time of my life were so shallow," and John leaned over to me and whispered, "Boobs."  Because let's be real:  that's what many, I dare say most young men are preoccupied with at the age of 19, missionaries or not.  ********  Ike has a musical program at school today, and it promises to be a lot like Emmett's recent musical program, which is to say that Ike will only be participating begrudgingly, because he feels that the music and actions are demeaning to him or something.  He's in grade school; what kind of refined musical palate can he even have?  ********  Grant was tardy to one of his classes yesterday, which is one thing, but what I want to talk about is this:  his teacher doesn't allow backpacks in the classroom.  There are a few teachers like that at his school--why?  Why can't they have backpacks?  I do not understand.  Are they worried about theft of sticky notes and markers?  Are they worried about terrorism?  ********  I gave Willa a haircut and it wasn't a disaster.  ********  Emmett never has any homework, which makes me a little suspicious until I remember it's Emmett.  ********  We had our New Beginnings program on Sunday night, and my remarks were useless, but thankfully the bishop batted cleanup for me and said all the right things.  I think this calling is making me neurotic and unsure of myself.